I’ve told you, there’s no point keeping those. They’re not tax-deductible,’ my dad thundered.’I think you’ll find they are,’ raged my mum like some sort of feral animal (a badger with TB perhaps).’They’re not. You only get VAT back on lunches outside of a 50-mile radius from your place of residence. You effing bitch,’ he seemed to add, with his eyes, I imagined.

I’ve told you, there’s no point keeping those. They’re not tax-deductible,’ my dad thundered.’I think you’ll find they are,’ raged my mum like some sort of feral animal (a badger with TB perhaps).’They’re not. You only get VAT back on lunches outside of a 50-mile radius from your place of residence. You effing bitch,’ he seemed to add, with his eyes, I imagined.

– Alan Partridge –

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