The largest website for English phrases and quotes

The largest website for English phrases and quotes

Tag: funny, quotes

Tammy Blackwell

There really isn’t much use in getting into a pissing contest since I have to sit down to pee anyway.

Twisted Hilarity

You ‘accidentally’ touched his bottom? Didn’t that happen when you last saw him aswell? Surprising how often that seems to be a problem.

Tammy Blackwell

No punching?” he asked.”No.””No kicking?””No.””How about arm wrestling?””No. And before you ask, we’ve avoided Slug Bug, Slap Bets, and any and all Dance-Offs.”Fate Succumbs

i like it because it is so funny and harry is so rude and but sometime he ca be nice to people.

I am Butler. Anything I say sounds scary.

You look worse today than you did when you had two blackeyes.”“Why, thank you, Tyler. You always say the sweetest things.

Tammy Blackwell

Have you ever chopped down something with an ax? Not fun. I now have serious doubts regarding George Washington and his cherry tree.

You’ve always been there for me. Always. Even when I…” V”Even when you what?” B”You know.” V”What?” B”Fuck. Even when I was in love with you. Or some shit.” VButch clasped his hands to his chest. “Was? Was? I can’t believe you’ve lost interest.” He threw one arm over his eyes, all Sarah Bernhardt. “My dreams of our future are shattered—” B”Shut it, cop.” VButch looked out from under his arm. “Are you kidding me? The reality show I had planned was fantastic. Was going to pitch it to VH1. Two Bites Are Better Than One. We were going to make millions .” B”Oh, for the love.

Turner let his face fell into his hands. “I’m never going to touch her again”, he moaned. “He’s never going to touch me again!” they heard Miranda roar.”Well,it doesn’t look like you’ll have much argument from your wife on that point”, Olivia chirped.

I love to stalk. I love to stalk you real, real good. I took your name home after our date and we had the best Google session of my life.

Am I picking you up tonight?” he asked. “Or do you still think I’m an ax murderer who might break into your house and off you and your family?”“Pretty sure you’d go all parkour on us. Instead of using an ax.”“Parkour? You think I’d use your family as an obstacle course?”“What?” I asked.He smothered a laugh. “Parkour is non-contact.”I felt my face redden. How was I supposed to know all that guy crap?

Sherrilyn Kenyon

It’s not fair!” (Ryssa)Because life was ever about fairness.Oh, to be as naive as his sister.